Change can be unsettling. Change has a tendency to bring up a huge amount of uncertainty and fear of the unknown to most everyone. Typically, we don’t just respond to change when it shows up in our lives and we are standing in the middle of it. Instead, change can truly consume us and take us over creating fear, doubt, and endless worry. We make it appear bigger, scarier, and much much longer of a process than it really needs to be. How does this happen? It begins with our pre-response to change BEFORE it actually even occurs or shows up in our lives. Anticipating its arrival we react with anxiety, uncertainty, and quite often the need for control. Then once change begins to appear you may find yourself in what I call “project mode”. “Project Mode” keeps us from having to really experience and feel the change while its happening - as if we can deflect it and deal with it later. Project mode is staying busy, busy, busy. It is a self protection strategy to keep the change at an arm’s distance length away. It keeps us abit above the realness of what is happening in our environment or life. Following project mode we continue swirling in the energy of change even AFTER it has happened - reviewing, reflecting, and wondering if we should have done it differently.
So when all is said and done - do you ever really allow yourself to experience the richness of change and appreciate it for what it really is? The process of change gifts you with two distinct moments. It has an ending component and a new beginning component. When you are in “project mode” you are somewhere in between the ending and the new beginning. If you chose to remain in “project mode” and avoid feeling the actual moments of when change occurs with an ending and a new beginning, this can lead to an inner struggle in not feeling safe or secure. This fear of insecurity moves you even deeper into “project mode” in an attempt to control outcomes. When you do not honor the two parts of change by embracing and accepting both the ending and the new beginning that is happening right now in your life, you create a breeding ground for looking outside of yourself to feel safe, secure, and to “handle” the change. This moves you even further away from your true self and prolongs the process. Change becomes scary and exhausting. Lets take a look at this common process again: So if you begin the process of change and are dealing with it BEFORE it actually happens by worrying, controlling, struggling, and freaking out AND you then hang out in “project mode” to get you through the change by being busy busy in an attempt to control outcomes AND THEN you deal with change after it happens by second guessing, doubting, wondering if you should have done it differently, or wishing you made a different choice ----- you never allow yourself to deeply and authentically experience the richness of CHANGE. Where did the two moments of an ending and new beginning go? Where were they? When did they actually happen? Did you even notice when the actual moments of change occurred?
This exhaustive process of “dealing with change” keeps you disconnected from what is really taking place. This distance removes you from the magic that can be found in all change. The magic of something ending and the true beauty of a new beginning. When you are disconnected from being present to the very change that is happening in your life you may find yourself seeking security in false things, people, and situations. This happens because when you are disconnected you are frantically looking for something to grab onto in your life. An analogy is an astronaut who needs to be corded to the space shuttle. If he or she de-cords and disconnects him or herself from the shuttle, panic will ensue and the tendency will be to reach for anything tangible in their immediate environment so not to get thrown out of control and deeper into outer space. Your spirit self will look elsewhere to ground, cord, or root into something. Unfortunately, you most likely will seek security outside of yourself that in the long run will not fulfill you.
To really over come the fear of change and embrace it for the magic that it is what you want to do is to cord yourself into the very experience that is happening. You want to root into the change. Connect with yourself. Cord into the very inner workings of you. You want to be present to each step - honoring the ending and the new beginning. Allow yourself the experience. Feel it and be with it~
What you will most likely discover is that the monster of change is not that scary at all. Our life is a mere series of consecutive moments. When you are present to those moments you can then see that the actual instance in which change occurs happens across just a few moments. Not days, months, or years. The moment you drive away from your old house to your new house is when the actual change happens. All the other moments prior are just different actions occurring in anticipation of the big change in moving. The moment you walk out of your house and drive to your new job. Is when the real change of starting a new job happens. It occurs when you walk in the door of your new office. You create all the other stuff and mistaken it for change. Instead of avoiding, denying, pretending, worrying, fearing, anticipating, and controlling, recognize change for what it is and the exact moment in which it happens. You will see it is truly beautiful! You will see the magic and richness in the change. You will see that it is not that big of a deal that you made it to be. You will see that it was unnecessary to prolong the change process - because all it was, was an instant moment.
When you break it down this way it allows change to reveal and show itself to you. This gifts you with the opportunity to take action ONLY when the right step is shown. Project mode occurs when you are taking action BEFORE the next step is presented to you. You are taking action based on fear or anticipation and this is why it shows up in your life as “being busy”. If you take action just when the next step is shown to you then life flows in a different way and does not come across as busy but instead as rich and full.
You will come to recognize how much unnecessary energy you were giving to the fear of change through an old exhaustive process. Now you can be rich with change and see it for what it really is.
1. Open your arms to receive and be ready for change when it first presents itself
2. Be present to each moment so you can feel and experience each step and take appropriate action when the time is right. Be aware of when you are getting too far ahead of yourself and you are in “project mode”. If you find yourself in “project mode” let go and just do the very next action step that you have to. Then wait until you know what to do next. This will simplify things and create a level of ease.
3. Pinpoint the exact moment of when the ending component of change occurs. (i.e. drove away from your old house with moving van full of your things)
4. Pinpoint the precise moment when the new beginning component of change occurs. (i.e. walking into new office for your first day at a new job)
5. Honor and celebrate both moments.
So the next time CHANGE shows up in your life know you can do it differently. Be present to each moment and step. Notice when the two parts of change actually occur. The exact moment of the ending and the precise moment of the new beginning. How great is that! Change is really only two moments. This eliminates prolonging the process and gives you an easier way to be with whatever change is happening in your life. Yes - it will still require action steps to walk through it all - but you can do it simpler, easier, and with grace and be RICH with CHANGE~